Sara, Brisbane - QLD / Turrbal Country
“They are confident, sure of themselves and know who they are as well and unschooling is a huge part of that.”
I can think of no better spokesperson for unschooling in Australia than Sara, whose four daughters (aged 15, 13, 10 and 8) have never been to school. This inspiring family of six who call sunny Queensland home, have collaboratively and creatively designed their lives. As well as unschooling, Sara is a passionate advocate for respectful parenting and children’s rights.
This is Episode 25 of the Australian Homeschool Stories Podcast - Sara’s Story:
Summary:
Growing up on the Sunshine Coast, Sara went from being private schooled herself to zero percent school for her own children but pre-kids she never imagined her children not following the well trodden path.
Once she became a mother, admiring her curious, happy, carefree children, all she could think was: school would wreck this.
If you had asked her as a child whether she enjoyed school herself she would have said she loved it, but looking back she can only remember the bad things, such as being overwhelmed and stressed by assessments and carrying everyday anxiety that she might get in trouble.
In the early years - life and play were inseparable. She found this stage of parenthood physically intense, but notes that it gets a lot easier, but also a lot busier.
The stereotype of teens being lazy is not her experience at all, they are on the go all the time, the have a million ideas and projects. They are not what people say.
Sara is really grateful that she started when they were really young and they never went to school. As a result her kids have grown up being in control of their own interests and learning for so long they are experts now.
“You know how young kids are excited by life, curious, they want to learn… They don’t lose that if they never go to school. They are the same. My 15 year old is the same as she was when she was 5. She is obviously very different and her interests are different and she wants to do different things but she has that same curiosity and motivation that she did when she was little.
People try to tell you that it’s normal to grow out of that but I disagree now that I know her and I know her friends. It’s not something you grow out of, I think it’s something that gets educated out of you at school.”
Sara defines adultism/childism and how this is perpetrated throughout modern day society. Most people who do not discriminate against people because of their gender, race or sexuality - even people who know that, don’t feel the same thing about kids. There is a way to do things better, where we can all be equal.
We all have different responsibilities based on our age and our relationship to children but that doesn’t mean we have different rights.
Unschooling is an extension of respectful parenting - If you can’t boss your kids into doing anything you want at home, why should you have to tell them what they can and can’t learn and when, what they have to wear at school and even when they can go to the toilet. Sara knew she couldn’t spend the first five years of her children’s lives creating a respectful, nurturing home environment and then be done with that and send her kids to school, where it’s the complete opposite.
Deschooling never ends. There is always more that comes ups and every age your kid gets to there is something else. Her own deschooling journey began by reading and she still feels compelled to keeping reading all she can about unschooling now as you are constantly surrounded by people who don’t believe what you believe.
She and her husband got to a point where they had read too much and could not knowingly send their girls to school knowing what they knew. Once you’ve gone down the rabbit hole, there is no turning back.
“I’ve never tried to make school sound bad. I don’t have to make school sound bad. If your experience of life is - I can get up and read a book, I can make some art and run outside when I need to move, I can eat when I want, I can go to the toilet when I want, I can wear my hair down, I can wear any clothes I want - than that makes school seem not that fun.”
More people need to talk about homeschooling and unschooling, so more people know this in an option, because so many still don’t.
The importance of having a community and feeling like you belong - they are providing this outside of school. If her kids thought about going to school, they’d have to give that up and they wouldn’t want to.
How her community has evolved over the years from early years to teens - book club, project fairs, talent show, markets, monthly excursions and lots of hanging out and playing.
“Join a community. Stick with in. Keep going and be part of all of it.”
Why we need to stop using the word sacrifice when it comes to choosing home education.
Unschooling is not just for the kids, you get to model being a self-directed learner. Her advice is to get interested in something yourself and show them what it looks like.
There is no end date to learning. Her own teenage daughter’s perspective is that nothing’s really going to change when she turns 18, they’ll just keep living like they are now and life will carry on as it always has into the future.
“Anything that I’ve not been able to do because I was doing this, was a choice I made. No one made me. If I wanted to do something else, I’d do it.
I’m having the time of my life.
Thank God I chose this. It’s the best time of my life and I get to spend so much time with my kids and I would have missed all that.”
You have a lot of time. You don’t need to know what you’re doing, you can just start and work it out as you go along. All of us are making it up as we go along.
No one is an expert. You can literally do whatever works for your family.
Inspiration
Love Learn Live - Csilla (book)
Free to Learn -
(book)Homegrown - Ben Hewitt (book)
Changing our Minds -
(book)All John Holt books
Parenting for Social Change -
Changing Education Paradigms - Sir Ken Robinson (video)
An Interview with children who have never been to school - (blog post)
Recommended Read Alouds
Keeper of the Lost Cities (series) - Shannon Messenger
A Tale of Magic (series) - Chris Colfer
Famous Five (series) - Enid Blyton
The Girl Who Drank the Moon - Kelly Barnhill
The War That Saved My Life - Kimberly Brubaker Bradley
Resources
Connect
Blog - happinessishereblog.com
Instagram - @sara_happiness.is.here
Facebook - Happiness is here
Food for thought
This podcast is recorded on the lands of the Bunurong people of the Kulin nation. I pay my respects to elders past, present and emerging and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded. This always was, always will be aboriginal land.
Original Music by Daniel Garrood @garroodcomposer
Listen on Spotify here
Ah, how lovely to read Sara's words here 🫶 Thank you for this Stephanie!